Have you had The Second Talk? {Giveaway}




Milestone birthdays always spark a torrent of reflection, and over the past year, I've done my fair share of looking back at what I've achieved. I've spent my last decade in a safe, happy cocoon, raising my kids, watching them grow from babies to kids. On a personal level, I've learned more about who I am, and what I want to do, and how to be comfortable with myself.

Now that I'm in my forties, I find myself looking forward to the next 10 or 15 years. I'm entering a completely different stage in my life, so I know the changes will be significant. Here are a few that I'm expecting, hoping for and dreading:

Doctors will find a cure for cancer.
Scientists will discover life somewhere in the universe.
My three children will leave home and go away to college.
My ninety-three year-old grandmother will likely pass away.
I will experience menopause.

Did that last one surprise you? I started menstruating fairly early (age 11), so I always thought I'd run out of eggs sooner than most. Then again, most women experience menopause between the ages of 40 and 58 (with an average age of 51), so it's not a huge stretch for me to expect it to happen in the next decade.

In some ways, I think menopause will be a relief -- no more awful menstrual cramps or bloating. Or maybe I'm just saying that to console myself about the other, not-so- great things that come with menopause. You're dry during sex but you pee in your pants. Your bones become brittle just as you gain weight.

And the hot flashes, oh, the hot flashes! All the horror stories I hear about menopause have to do with hot flashes and sweating. My mother-in-law got into endless squabbles with her husband because she kept kicking the blankets off in the middle of winter (she tells me her night sweats left her so drenched that she could literally wring her nightdress out). Unfortunately, she was drenched in all the wrong places -- she says if only she had a bit more moisture in, ummm, more private places, at least they'd have had some great make-up sex after all those squabbles! But no, menopause had to ruin the fun of make-up sex, too.

My own mother broke her own decades-long aversion to sleeveless tops for my sister's
wedding because she figured the mother of the bride would probably not look her best
with sweat drenching her gown (It's always good form to compliment the mother of the
bride for looking as youthful and fit as her daughter, but I don't think stained armpits is the kind of "hot" my mother was going for). I have a thyroid disorder, so I already feel uncomfortably warm when my husband is wrapped up in sweaters and blankets. Add a hot flash to that, and I'm moving to Iceland.

No, menopause is definitely no picnic, and I'll take any and all the help I can get to get through it with the minimum of discomfort and embarrassment. So it's nice to know that Poise is coming out with a line of products to help -- personal lubricant, roll-on cooling gel, and body cooling towelettes. They even have an online site, the2ndtalk.com, where you can share what you're going through and get information
and support. You can even share your embarrassing stories and feel a bit better
knowing that you're not the only one who feels like stripping down to her underwear all the time. Not that I have anything against Iceland, but it sure sounds a lot easier than relocating halfway across the world!


Win a “Hot Flash Prize Pack” from Poise
One lucky Bonggamom Finds reader will win a Hot Flash Prize Pack featuring a $50 gift card and Poise products.

Required Entry
Join the 2nd talk at the2ndtalk.com and share your experiences with menopause, whether you have gone through it yourself or you've had a friend who has gone through it. Then leave a comment on this post and give me a short recap of the story you shared.

Extra Entries
For extra entries, you can do any or all of the following. Please leave a separate comment for each extra entry with a way to verify the entry (i.e. tweet link, blog post link, Facebook id, Twitter id, etc.).

1) Follow Bonggamom Finds on Blogger (1 entry)

2) Follow bonggamom on Instagram (1 entry)

3) Follow bonggamom on Pinterest (1 entry)

4) Pin this giveaway on Pinterest (you can use the "pin it" button below! -- 1 entry).

5) Write this on the Bonggamom Finds Facebook page (1 entry):
I entered the Poise giveaway!

6) Follow @bonggafinds on Twitter and tweet this, up to once per day (1 entry per day):
RT @bonggafinds Win a Hot Flash gift pack w/ $50 giftcard from Poise ! #giveaway


The Rules
This giveaway ends at 11:59PM PST on November 7, 2012; I will draw a winner at random on November 8 and post his/her name after she/he confirms acceptance. Continental US residents only. For additional giveaway rules, click here.




Disclosure: This is a paid post, courtesy of Poise.  All views and opinions expressed here are my own.  

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116 Comments, Leave yours here:

Heather! on October 16, 2012 at 1:58 AM said...

I joined The 2nd Talk and shared my story, which was really just an expression of my concern for the intimacy between my husband and me when menopause starts. I am still a number of years away from it, but as I approach 40 I think about it more and more. Like you, I am sort of looking forward to it, but I am a little bit concerned about some of the hormonal effects.

Thanks!
h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 16, 2012 at 1:59 AM said...

I follow via GFC/Blogger!
h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 16, 2012 at 2:01 AM said...

I pinned this!

http://pinterest.com/pin/152207662377723881/

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 16, 2012 at 2:02 AM said...

I wrote on your FB wall!

https://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151220149338151

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 16, 2012 at 2:03 AM said...

I follow you on Twitter and I tweeted!

https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/258130936816869377

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 17, 2012 at 2:57 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/258506790453530624

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

CindyWindy2003 on October 17, 2012 at 7:29 AM said...

i'm not going through it but my mom is, i wrote how i was not looking forward to it at all, carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

CindyWindy2003 on October 17, 2012 at 7:30 AM said...

Follow bonggamom on Pinterest @carawling, carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

CindyWindy2003 on October 17, 2012 at 7:33 AM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling2/status/258575748879745025
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Heather! on October 18, 2012 at 1:39 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/258849535193915393

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

CindyWindy2003 on October 18, 2012 at 9:57 AM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling2/status/258974467735293952
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

CindyWindy2003 on October 19, 2012 at 5:24 AM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling2/status/259256460872138752
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Heather! on October 20, 2012 at 3:31 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/259602442491154432

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 21, 2012 at 2:24 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/259948256077959168

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 22, 2012 at 2:27 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/260310883023085568

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

peg42 on October 22, 2012 at 4:15 AM said...

Joined the 2ndtalk and shared my story:
I'm 51 and starting showing signs of hot flashes and irregular periods about 2 years ago. Now, my periods are seldom if any and I am experiencing hot flashes and night sweats almost daily. Honestly, it's not too bad but I still hate the idea of "going through the change."
Thanks so much.
rickpeggysmith(at)aol(dot)com

peg42 on October 22, 2012 at 4:16 AM said...

Follow on Pinterest (Margaret Smith/rickpeggysmith)
Thanks so much.
rickpeggysmith(at)aol(dot)com

peg42 on October 22, 2012 at 4:18 AM said...

Follow on FB (Margaret E. Smith) and commented: https://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds#!/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151229429558151
Thanks so much.
rickpeggysmith(at)aol(dot)com

peg42 on October 22, 2012 at 4:19 AM said...

Follow on twitter (peg42) and tweeted: https://twitter.com/peg42/status/260339406781677568
Thanks so much.
rickpeggysmith(at)aol(dot)com

CindyWindy2003 on October 22, 2012 at 4:36 PM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling/status/260522365325291520
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Heather! on October 23, 2012 at 4:02 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/260697515135991808

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

CindyWindy2003 on October 23, 2012 at 1:43 PM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling/status/260839846380199937
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Heather! on October 24, 2012 at 5:20 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/261079556843266049

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

CindyWindy2003 on October 24, 2012 at 12:58 PM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling/status/261188865304457216
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Heather! on October 25, 2012 at 3:56 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/261420669131169792

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

CindyWindy2003 on October 25, 2012 at 6:10 AM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling/status/261446186941169665
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Heather! on October 26, 2012 at 4:08 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/261786248786628609

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 27, 2012 at 5:18 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/262166208730783744

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Heather! on October 28, 2012 at 2:24 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/262484868200554496

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

kellyr78 on October 28, 2012 at 7:20 AM said...

I wrote my post called "early"ish" menopause about how my mom went through hers early and I hope to have as easy of a time with it as she seemed to.
KellywcuATyahooDOTcom

kellyr78 on October 28, 2012 at 7:20 AM said...

I follow you on Blogger(kellyr78)
KellywcuATyahooDOTcom

kellyr78 on October 28, 2012 at 7:21 AM said...

I follow you on pinterest(Kelly Saver)
KellywcuATyahooDOTcom

kellyr78 on October 28, 2012 at 7:22 AM said...

I wrote on your FB page that I entered.
https://www.facebook.com/#!/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151238501648151

kellywcuATyahooDOTcom

kellyr78 on October 28, 2012 at 7:23 AM said...

I follow you on twitter(Kellydinpa) And tweeted
https://twitter.com/Kellydinpa/status/262560166313070593

kellywcuATyahooDOTcom

Heather! on October 29, 2012 at 4:53 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/262884787054845956

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Sarah on October 29, 2012 at 4:50 PM said...

I joined the talk, and shared about my experiences with early menopause at age 35 due to lupus kidney failure and trying to find a treatment that I could tolerate with my limitations due to health history.

Heather! on October 30, 2012 at 3:00 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/263218524552568832

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

CindyWindy2003 on October 30, 2012 at 12:50 PM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling/status/263363627963281408
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Heather! on October 31, 2012 at 3:05 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/263582232139145216

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

CindyWindy2003 on October 31, 2012 at 9:10 AM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling/status/263671042604687360
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Heather! on November 1, 2012 at 5:13 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/263976893919928321

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

CindyWindy2003 on November 1, 2012 at 8:55 AM said...

https://twitter.com/carawling/status/264031048512442368
carawling(at)hotmail(dot)com

Sherrie on November 1, 2012 at 4:46 PM said...

Joined 'The Second Talk' and shared my story which discusses my hysterectomy at age 22 as well as my bouts with menopausal symptoms over the years.

http://www.poise.com/personal-stories-and-blogs/stories-from-real-women/written-story?threadID=800001306

callawishes(at)hotmail(dot)com

Sherrie on November 1, 2012 at 4:47 PM said...

Follow Bonggamom Finds on Blogger as Shay

callawishes(at)hotmail(dot)com

Sherrie on November 1, 2012 at 4:49 PM said...

Pinned

http://pinterest.com/pin/108156828522613423/

callawishes(at)hotmail(dot)com

Sherrie on November 1, 2012 at 4:50 PM said...

Wrote on you Facebook wall as Sherrie Cruson

callawishes(at)hotmail(dot)com

Sherrie on November 1, 2012 at 4:51 PM said...

Following you on twitter @callawishes2 and tweeted

https://twitter.com/callawishes2/status/264152490566635520

Michele P. on November 1, 2012 at 6:23 PM said...

I posted to their community as Michele under First signs of Menopause... I am currently going through some of the body changes now-skipped periods, breast tenderness, sore back, cold flashes (only 1 hot flash so far) chest pains & palpitations (dr. checked me out, NOT my heart thank goodness)and it was nice to know there is a community out there for an almost 47 yr old woman to go to where I can read about others issues & know I am not alone!

micaela6955 at msn dot com

Michele P. on November 1, 2012 at 6:23 PM said...

your gfc follower michele p
micaela6955 at msn dot com

Michele P. on November 1, 2012 at 6:24 PM said...

your pinterest follower michele pineda

micaela6955 at msn dot com

Michele P. on November 1, 2012 at 6:25 PM said...

your twitter follower micaela6955 tweet https://twitter.com/micaela6955/status/264176233212952577

micaela6955 at msn dot com

Michele P. on November 1, 2012 at 6:27 PM said...

left comment on your FB page https://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151246129403151

as Michele PIneda

micaela6955 at msn dot com

slehan on November 1, 2012 at 8:31 PM said...

https://twitter.com/slehan/status/264205862225211392

slehan at juno dot com

Heather! on November 2, 2012 at 2:20 AM said...

Tweet!

https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/264295754561114112

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

slehan on November 2, 2012 at 3:07 PM said...

https://twitter.com/slehan/status/264488506292850688

slehan at juno dot com

Heather! on November 3, 2012 at 5:24 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/264704490870034432

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Anonymous said...

I joined and I shared a story about my mom when she was going through menopause.

pokergrl8 at gmail.com

Anonymous said...


following you on pinterest as http://pinterest.com/mandy375/ (amanda sakovitz)

pokergrl8 at gmail.com

Anonymous said...

http://pinterest.com/pin/216735800788649101/

pokergrl8 at gmail.com

Anonymous said...

I wrote on your wall

https://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151248321998151

pokergrl8 at gmail.com

Anonymous said...

follow & tweet

https://twitter.com/aes529/status/264759355247828992

pokergrl8 at gmail.com

Unknown on November 3, 2012 at 3:23 PM said...

I joined and talked about my wife going through menopause

rounder9834 at yahoo dot com

Unknown on November 3, 2012 at 3:24 PM said...

gfc follower thomas murphy

rounder9834 at yahoo dot com

Unknown on November 3, 2012 at 3:24 PM said...

following you on pinterest http://pinterest.com/rounder9834/

rounder9834 at yahoo dot com

Unknown on November 3, 2012 at 3:25 PM said...

I pinned

http://pinterest.com/pin/38280665554202167/

Unknown on November 3, 2012 at 3:25 PM said...

I wrote on your wall

http://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151248789428151

Unknown on November 3, 2012 at 3:26 PM said...

following and tweeted

https://twitter.com/thomasmurphy40/status/264856015869198336

rounder9834 at yahoo dot com

Heather! on November 4, 2012 at 5:09 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/265078099048288256

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Anonymous said...

https://twitter.com/aes529/status/265134143875194880

Unknown on November 4, 2012 at 1:31 PM said...

https://twitter.com/thomasmurphy40/status/265204422366339072
rounder9834 @yahoo.com

slehan on November 4, 2012 at 4:03 PM said...

https://twitter.com/slehan/status/265237695838691328

slehan at juno dot com

Heather! on November 5, 2012 at 2:00 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/265393010748039168

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Anonymous said...

my story was questions about menopause jen gersch intime@myself.com

Unknown on November 5, 2012 at 11:36 AM said...

https://twitter.com/thomasmurphy40/status/265538007568891904
rounder9834 @yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

https://twitter.com/aes529/status/265565840487903232
pokergrl8 at gmail.com

Sherrie on November 5, 2012 at 4:51 PM said...

Daily tweet

https://twitter.com/callawishes2/status/265617019880222721

esldiane@gmail.com on November 5, 2012 at 6:02 PM said...

I went into menopause very early, due to surgery to remove my ovaries. It's not fun, but you deal with the hot flashes and make stupid jokes with my other friends dealing with it
Diane Baum
esldiane@gmail.com

slehan on November 5, 2012 at 7:23 PM said...

https://twitter.com/slehan/status/265655141837975552

slehan at juno dot com

♡♥♬ Carolsue ♡♥♬ on November 6, 2012 at 1:39 AM said...

My Mom has gone through with no problems whatsoever. Hope I am as lucky.
Digicats {at} Sbcglobal {dot} Net

♡♥♬ Carolsue ♡♥♬ on November 6, 2012 at 1:40 AM said...

I follow you on Pinterest as cezovski9
Digicats {at} Sbcglobal {dot} Net

♡♥♬ Carolsue ♡♥♬ on November 6, 2012 at 1:41 AM said...

I follow you on Twitter as MsCarolsueA and I tweeted
https://twitter.com/MsCarolsueA/status/265750532633788416
Digicats {at} Sbcglobal {dot} Net

Heather! on November 6, 2012 at 2:11 AM said...

Tweet!
https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/265758183761539072

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

Unknown on November 6, 2012 at 12:16 PM said...

https://twitter.com/thomasmurphy40/status/265910542072426497
rounder9834 @yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

https://twitter.com/aes529/status/265979968746561536
pokergrl8 at gmail.com

Sherrie on November 6, 2012 at 5:39 PM said...

Daily tweet

https://twitter.com/callawishes2/status/265991564470407168

Heather! on November 7, 2012 at 12:39 AM said...

Last day tweet! :)

https://twitter.com/hybroanglid/status/266097310000365569

h4schaffer at gmail dot com

susan1215 on November 7, 2012 at 7:18 AM said...

I joined 2nd talk and shared my story I'm 49 and started going through menapause a couple of years ago. I was kind of suprised because I thought I was a bit young. While I love not having my period I don't like the hot flashes and the change in moods I experience. I think I have cried more in this last year than I have my entire life.

s2s2 at comcast dot net

susan1215 on November 7, 2012 at 7:21 AM said...

http://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151254441683151

wrote on your wall

s2s2 at comcast dot net

susan1215 on November 7, 2012 at 7:22 AM said...

follow via Pinterest susan12151962

s2s2 at comcast dot net

susan1215 on November 7, 2012 at 7:23 AM said...

https://twitter.com/susan1215/status/266198990335397888

s2s2 at comcast dot net

susan1215 on November 7, 2012 at 7:24 AM said...

http://pinterest.com/pin/185773553350561845/

susan1215 on November 7, 2012 at 7:26 AM said...

follow via GFC

s2s2 at comcast dot net

susansmoaks on November 7, 2012 at 12:19 PM said...

i shared a story about my mom who has been through the change
susansmoaks at gmail dot com

Unknown on November 7, 2012 at 1:25 PM said...

https://twitter.com/thomasmurphy40/status/266290168963682305
rounder9834 @yahoo.com

cman on November 7, 2012 at 3:24 PM said...

My mom went through it a few years ago.

Anonymous said...

https://twitter.com/aes529/status/266350276003368960
pokergrl8 at gmail.com

daveshir2005 on November 7, 2012 at 5:42 PM said...

I wrote about how I am looking forward to it and afraid at the same time. Not sure how my relationship with my husband will change.

email/ daveshir2005@yahoo.com
fb/ shirley greenawalt zolenski

daveshir2005 on November 7, 2012 at 5:43 PM said...

pinned
http://pinterest.com/pin/193514115210227079/

email/ daveshir2005@yahoo.com

daveshir2005 on November 7, 2012 at 5:44 PM said...

posted on your fb wall
https://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151255381293151

email/ daveshir2005@yahoo.com

daveshir2005 on November 7, 2012 at 5:44 PM said...

follow u on twitter as daveshir2005 and tweeted
https://twitter.com/daveshir2005/status/266355503553204226

email/ daveshir2005@yahoo.com

Sherrie on November 7, 2012 at 6:32 PM said...

Daily tweet

https://twitter.com/callawishes2/status/266367442773741568

Julieh on November 7, 2012 at 7:35 PM said...

I wrote about how I am not looking forward to it.
julie hawkins
honeypie411 at yahoo dot com

Julieh on November 7, 2012 at 7:35 PM said...

follow on interest as honeypie411
hneypie411 at yahoo dot com

Julieh on November 7, 2012 at 7:36 PM said...

pin:http://pinterest.com/pin/205969382929496938/
honeypie411 at yahoo dot com

Julieh on November 7, 2012 at 7:37 PM said...

tweet:https://twitter.com/jhoneypie411/status/266383746675134464
honeypie411 at yahoo dot com

Julieh on November 7, 2012 at 7:38 PM said...

wrote on your fb;https://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151255502493151
honeypie411 at yahoo dot com

Unknown on November 7, 2012 at 9:13 PM said...

I haven't experienced menopause yet but I have heard all of te horrific tales about hot flashes. garrettsambo@aol.com

Betty C on November 7, 2012 at 10:05 PM said...

I shared my story of mood swings titled "What I didn't know"
I didn't think I had mood swings but my daughter let me know that my mood swings had been pretty dramatic. Of course, that was 20 years ago and maybe I just forgot :)

willitara [at] gmail [dot] com

Betty C on November 7, 2012 at 10:06 PM said...

I follow with GFC.

Betty C

Betty C on November 7, 2012 at 10:07 PM said...

I follow on Pinterest.
Betty Curran (http://pinterest.com/bettycurr/)

Betty C on November 7, 2012 at 10:11 PM said...

Pinned it.
http://pinterest.com/pin/122089839869810508/

Betty C on November 7, 2012 at 10:13 PM said...

I commented on Facebook.
http://www.facebook.com/BonggamomFinds/posts/10151255621608151

Betty C on November 7, 2012 at 10:14 PM said...

I follow on Twitter and tweeted - https://twitter.com/willitara/status/266423337419436032

slehan on November 7, 2012 at 10:31 PM said...

https://twitter.com/slehan/status/266402308542312449

slehan at juno dot com

Sand on November 7, 2012 at 11:25 PM said...

My mom went through it and didn't have any problems so I'm hoping that my experience is similar to hers.

bonggamom on November 9, 2012 at 10:32 AM said...

Congratulations to the winner: #96, susansmoakes!

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